The South Stand Report : Toronto v Montreal, V-Cup Edition

A famous pundit once said “You can’t win anything with kids”. And that pundit was spot on as Manchester United went on to lose 5 more games at the end of that season. Sure they won 25 other games after that, and the league, but you can’t deny the truth that kids suck at football.

To be fair, when it was said, they weren’t missing at least 2 out of 3 designated players (with the third to be determined after this is written) and about to play in the oft-overlooked Voyageurs Cup. Which it shouldn’t be. Why? I want Champions League soccer. I LOVE when Mexican teams show up. That’s a true test of mettle and it’s a meaningful game.

Anyways, I get dizzy on my perch. Montreal also has some international call-ups, as well as injury problems so it’s likely going to be TFC-B versus Montreal Baby Cheeses. We’ll see a few players from days gone by, one or two you only read about in TFC II match reports, and Mo Babouli and Benoit Cheyrou.

I’m weirdly optimistic and I hope they impress, even a little.

Bold Predictions :

1. Giovinco won’t be on the bench
2. Drogba will be on the bench, but won’t play
3. Someone’s getting a brace, don’t care which side

On to the Match :

14’ – GOAL – cross whipped in, expertly controlled by Osorio, settles it down and pops it in
BROBINS 1, FROMAGE 0

“BROBINS” was an idea from @duncanDFletcher, after writing down “B-ROBINS”, as in B team, and wanting to drop the “B” because they were playing good , so “BROBINS” was kept because it was amusing us. ~ Ed.

20-ish’ – Drogba goes down. He looks bad. Surely they must be prepping for amputation somewhere.

22-ish’ – Drogba, against all logic and reason, is up and is continuing in the match. No wonder he’s a legend!

35’ – GOAL – Babouli turns and threads a pass, Hamilton gets a sliding touch to it, falls to Osorio and pops it in.  Again.
BROBINS 2, FROMAGE 0

45’ – RED – Lovitz gets a vicious tackle from Patrice Bernier (whaaaaaaaa?!?) and the ref wastes no time sending the Bernier off.

Half Time Mood : the kids are alright. Been largely all Toronto

55’ – Cheyrou has a go from 25 yards out curling viciously but just misses the top right corner

62’ – GOAL – Jordan Hamilton gets the ball at the top of the box, cuts back to shake his marker, lays a low left shot. Welcome to the big boys team sir.
BROBINS 3, FROMAGE 0

Quote of the Match

Is that three Canadian goals scored?

~ Neighbour in front of us

Yes it is. Yes it is.

76 – SUB – Cheyrou comes off for Chapman and gets a nice applause.

80’ – GOAL – Hamilton collects the ball 10 yards out and buries it.
BROBINS 4, FROMAGE 0

82’ – SUB – Malik Johnson comes on for Babouli.  Welcome to the first time.

84’ – SUB – Lovitz makes way for Brian James.  Another debut!

86’ – GOAL – Drogba pops a cross over the defence and Salazar gets his head to it, beating Irwin from 6 yards out.  That was crazy and way overdue.
BROBINS 4, FROMAGE 1

3 mins of extra time

90 +1’ – GOAL – Drogba floats a stunner into the bottom left corner.
BROBINS 4, FROMAGE 2

90+1′ – YELLOW – After the goal, Piatti gets in the way of the keeper and earns a wee shove from Irwin after the goal was scored and “Drogbas” all over the ground.  First off, the refs didn’t fall for it.  Secondly, he looks up to see that neither the ref or the linesman was having it and gets up to complain to the linesman.  Piatti should’ve got a booking for that move.

Full Time : Toronto 4, Montreal 2

Man of the Match : Osorio with his brace.  So wanted a hat-trick for him.

Goat of the Game : Piatti was so shit tonight. Toronto looked excellent.

Ref Rating : 5 out of 5. No complaints.

I Am Not The Gaffer, But… : it was a tactical masterstroke!

In Case You PVR’d It : you’ll enjoy the drama.  It’s a fun game.

Kit Spotting : there’s a kid at the end of the Match wearing an Asteras Tripoli from the Greek league. I had to look it up to confirm the badge.

Bold Prediction Results :

1. Nailed Giovinco not being on the bench.  I’m so brilliant.
2. Failed the Drogba thing.  Though he looked to be on life-support, he persevered through the whole match
3. Nailed the brace call TWICE, and it was all Canadian

Aside from the drama at the end, Montreal were the perfect villians tonight : red card at halftime, goals from Osorio and Hamilton, all the kids playing well, Montreal playing ineffective and brutal for much of the match, Drogba wankering like a seasoned pro, Piatti (whom I’ve been a fan of) was absolutely terrible.

Take away the two goals at the end of the night, which were tough to prevent, and Toronto looked fun.  You remember fun, right?  They moved the ball well, everyone played a role, no one was really leaned upon to do heavy lifting.  Sure, Montreal’s back line looked abysmal at best, but let’s not let 4 goals lose their luster because of poor defense.  And I’m also trying not to let the “lesser trophy” attitude of both sides ruin a great night out.

Player Ratings : Irwin 6, Beitashour 6.5, Zavaleta 6, Hagglund 6, Morgan 6.5, Lovitz 6.5 [James N/A], Delgado 6, Cheyrou 7 [Chapman N/A], Osorio 8, Babouli 6.5 [Johnson N/A], Hamilton 8.