The South Couch Report : Chicago v Toronto


Man, I am super proud of this one.


Long weekends… aren’t they the bestest evar!!??! I’m sure nothing can ruin it… except the potential result of a Toronto FC match. There’s no telling what we might find tonight, delicious creme eggs or rabbit droppings.

Chicago are coming off of their first victory of the season and the robins have a much more bolstered edition of their lineup with the return of Bradley, Altidore and Morrow. Will we be a solid Cadbury bunny, or one of those hollow Allen easter eggs (which are gross and are used to indicate the opposite)? Only 90 minutes and the easter bunny can tell.

On To The Match…

1’ – Looking at the well vacant stands, it seems Chicago has the same problem as Toronto when it comes to getting to your seats on time. Who’d have thought that I’d be the strange one wanting to be there on time.

3’ – YELLOW – Creavalle gets booked for stamping the foot of a forward after Warren couldn’t control the nearly blown goal kick from Bendik.

7’ – Morgan’s cross finds Giovinco, but the Atomic Ant couldn’t get a full shot off with a defender on top of him.

9’ – Chicago quickly turns as Accam burns his marker to get a shot off, but stopped by Bendik

12’ – Findley falls down in the penalty area. Replay shows he should be fined after the fact for diving. Commentators are giving him an out for ‘seams in the pitch’. How nice for the excuse and how sad for Findley.

14’ – GOAL – After a pile of pressure, give and go with Maloney and Jones slides it past Bendik in the far post.

20’ – GOAL Giovinco takes a ball from Morgan and rolls a weak ball that takes a deflection and catches Busch wrong footed. Whatever, beggars and all that…

23’ – Sure, Creavalle didn’t just bowl over Maloney for no call.

35’ – Big counter as Accam leaves Morgan behind, but Bendik stops the breakaway with confidence.

40’ – Creavalle crosses a ball to Osorio, who fires just wide of the post

Half-time mood : Confused, are Chicago good or is Toronto? Is Chicago bad or Toronto? This is worse than the time I had the debate with someone between the vastly superior Mini-Eggs and the close-but-not-close-enough Eggies.

49’ – How that strong arm on Creavalle wasn’t a penalty…

52’ – GOAL – Counterattack finds Giovinco down on the wing, pitches the ball back into the middle to Cheyrou and the FIFA 13 gold player buries it on the volley. Formidable!

54‘ – GOAL – Awwwwwsonova… Maloney takes a cross on the left side of the pitch, beats his marker one-on-one and the curls it around traffic and past Bendik. It’s like Toronto can’t have nice things…

67’ – RED – Creavalle gets his second red after dragging his leg across Accam. Stupid, stuipd foul.

68’ – GOAL – Because Toronto. Jeff Larentowicz puts it out of the reach of an outstretched Bendik

71’ – SUB – Findley off for Jackson. Probably too late there.

72’ – Jones tries to give Jackson the same strong arm treatment while defending. Jackson tests the ref’s standards and pushes back, no call thankfully and a cross into traffic get gobbled up by Bush

76’ – Damn, what a flurry. Bendik somehow keeps composure to stop a Shipp shot, rebound ends up at Accam and he fires it, Bendik stops that, but it was called offside. Amazing stuff.

80’ – SUB – Osorio off for Dike

84’ – Igboananike races away into the corner, Hagglund gets back to mark, but cuts the ball back to Accam and he just puts the ball over the bar. Frightening counter.

88′ – SUB – Lovitz comes in for Morgan

90’ – YELLOW – Morrow gets booked for taking down Igboananike, who probably would’ve hurt Toronto had Morrow not nabbed him

4 mins of extra time

Full Time : Chicago 3, Toronto 2

Man of the Match :  Aside from getting caught on the third goal, Bendik had a solid game.  Morgan was everywhere, Giovinco was a threat all game… but no one was outstanding.

Goat of the Game : Creavalle.  I’ll give you the stomping first one and call it mistimed, but that second one was a howler.

Ref Rating : 2 out of 5.  He was bad both ways and consistent with the calls.  Not the villain of the piece, but annoying.

I’m Not The Gaffer But… : I would’ve started Dike, or at least subbed out Findley 10 minutes earlier.

In Case You PVR’d It… : Watch the first 35 and from 50th minute onward.  That middle part is skipable.

Well, Igboananike and Accam were a small bucket of terror.  Chicago has some fun times ahead of themselves with those two… I was sure Dike would’ve earned a bigger chunk of time after the abusing of Olave last week.  That’s a guy who does not get pushed around much… There was only a few times where I noticed Bradley taking the ball from the back four and moving it up himself.  Either he’s trusting more or they’re not always looking for the captain to give it to him.  Good to see… I really hope I don’t get a rice crispy Allan bunny this year.  Partially because I’m closer to retirement than adolescence, partially because it’s gross, and partially because they’ll be consumed… Osorio was a bit more visible tonight.  Makes me feel better for him as I have a sinking feeling he’s currently most likely to be trade-bait, and then he’ll score a brace against us sometime in September.

Player Ratings : Bendik 6.5, Morgan 6.5 [Lovitz N/A], Morrow 6, Hagglund 6, Creavalle 4, Bradley 6, Cheyrou 6.5, Osorio 6, Giovinco 6.5, Findley 5 [Jackson N/A], Altidore 6

Author: Mark Hinkley

Mark is a full-time graphic designer, full-time smart ass and full-time logo, stadium and kit nerd. When he isn't writing ridiculous match reports or redesigning logos for his own amusement, he's salivating over the day that promotion and relegation occurs in MLS. You can follow him @kitnerdmark on the twitterz.

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  1. feel like the build up to the first goal justified the deflection and the comical goalkeeping howler. add those two things together and that’s one of my favourite TFC goals ever.

    to answer your question Chicago and TFC are both bad defensively. Fire had 2 goals in 4 games before this, and deservedly so. accam and igboananike do indeed look dangerous, but in a hilariously impotent fashion. It’s like they’ve signed oduro and amarikwa. and they already have amarikwa.

    creavalle definite goat. we’re asking him to do too much, it’s not really fair to him, but unless we’re going to start asking less of the full backs he needs to be gone from the first team sharpish. I hope he can rebuild his reputation after we trade/dump him, he deserves better.

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    • Burn on Amarikwa! Take that you reject-turned-improved-forward!

      I’m still establishing a baseline for Toronto. Trying to figure out what to expect game to game and I don’t pay much attention to the opposition, save their standings. Both sides are underachieving, but they have less an excuse.

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  2. I thought Hagglund looked pretty shit today. I think he gave the attackers way too much room to attack. If the guy is running at you and you keep backpedaling until he’s right in perfect position for a shot, then I think you aren’t really defending. At some point you gotta commit and make a tackle. This happened a few times today. Along with Creavalle, there are some major defensive problems on this team. Hope Caldwell and Perquis are back soon.

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    • Hagglund certainly didn’t show much urgency on the Maloney goal, don’t know if he was trying to hold him up and wait for help that never came, but ended up giving him way too much time.

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    • Agreed. We’ve seen Hagglund play worse than that, but you’re right about the back pedaling. It was a bit much.

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  3. Don’t let our DP’s get off so easily if this team is “top heavy” that top will have to save the day.

    Shockingly Vanney was complaining about our inability to defend in the box. Hope he follows thru on his analysis. This team can score, MLS referees may try to blunt it, but the team can score. Now, if we can only defend and have a manager committed to defending

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    • Dp’s? Well bradley was very involved, though not in the defending of the first goal, very lackadiasical stuff from him there. Altidore did some nice coming back to link play, but never looked like a goal threat. apparently he got a shot on goal, I don’t remember that, but again, only 1, think that’s 4 shots total for him in 3 games, one of which was a penalty. not enough. Giovinco had a lot of little moments that looked very good, and did very well on Cheyrou’s goal. got more than lucky on his goal, scuffed the shot. Still not really involved enough for my liking, but did some good things today when he was.

      Good that vanney’s talking about the defending. he was complaining about people not making the right decision, individual decisions and lack of urgency. as if his game plan’s ideal, they’re just not executing it right. maybe change the plan, don’t ask so much of them, especially the full backs. Your plan seems like a very nice one, but it’s perhaps a wee bit unrealistic. you’ve got an MLS team Greg, full of MLS players, they’re going to make bad decisions at times, maybe don’t have a system that puts so much emphasis on individual decisions, that can minimise the trouble that comes from those mistakes.

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      • The book on the Reds seems to be to clog up the middle and pack the centre of the box. How many blocked shot did Bradley have, three?

        If the centre is packed the wings are the 407 at 11 pm on a Sunday night, empty. The thing right now, save Morgan and Gio’s goal, Vanney’s team is bereft of any ideas out there.

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        • Given that we’re mainly relying on full backs to provide the width, not a terrible idea really. with all due respect to overlapping full backs, and for Morgan’s ability to put in a cross which is quite good, they’re not full on wingers for a reason, ie they’re not quite good enough for it, so why not sacrifice that bit of space if the best we’re going to have in there is full backs.

          Another benefit to leaving the wings open like that, encourages those full backs to get forward, as Vanney is urging them to do, thus leaving space behind them for the counter attack. Like some kind of martial art, leverage your opponents strengths against them.

          Also, hey, if Giovinco’s the centre forward, might as well let people get wide to put crosses in, not like he’s an aerial threat. just need to actually be vigilant and keep an eye on where he is which chicago comically failed to do on his goal, he got wide open simply by slowing down a bit.

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  4. Mark I like your summary format. I liked the Man, Goat, Ref and player ratings.

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    • Thanks man. The match reports are supposed to be a stream of consciousness, and easily digestible. I leave the “serious” journalism to the others. 🙂

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