South Couch Report : DC v Toronto

DC United as the DC Diplomats

The Part I Write Before :

Man, how long has it been? A meaningless match. How complacent have we all been with this that we forgot hahahahahahaha… We’ll never forget. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll always enjoy, at the very least, chasing the last playoff spot, but this season has been one oversized shrug.

DC have been killing it since Rooney’s arrival, from the foot of the table, currently sitting in sixth, and marching upward.

On to the Match :

11′ – Hagglund gets up for a corner and heads it down with power, but lands right at the feet of Bill Hamid.

18′ – GOAL – Holy shit. Rooney steps up to take a free kick from 30 yards out and curls out wide before breaking in and finds the net out of Bono’s reach. Just fantastic.
CREAMING EAGLES 1, ROBINS 0

30′ – Acosta gets on the end of a over the top ball, full volley, smashes it into the far corner, but the flag was up. Wow.

37′ – Bored.

45′ – Rooney corner kick takes a header from DeLeon, skims off Asad and hits the crossbar.

Halftime Mood : could be worse.

49′ – Rooney gets the ball just over the halfway line, runs into the box, but runs out of space… Well it was more excited watching it than writing it out.

57′ – Acosta gets the ball from 10 yards out, slides it past two defenders and a keeper, but not a goal post.

59′ – SUB – Chapman on for Hamilton.

69′ – SUB – Akinola on for Bakero.

76′ – Bored again.

80′ – SUB – Hagglund off for Morgan.

2 mins of extra time

90+2′ – Acosta and Asad on the counter attack giving back and forth and just as the ball gets laid off to Acosta to fire it, Janson tackles the ball away.

Full Time : DC United 1, Toronto 0

Man of the Match : Janson.
Goat of the Game : So many meh players.
Ref Rating : 5 out of 5
I Am Not The Gaffer, But… : it’s what I expected
In Case You PVR’d It : you may as well just watch the highlight package on the MLS site to save your time fast forwarding.

Was anyone truly surprised by the outcome? Even if they started their best XI, this was the scoreline… How about that Canadian Women’s National Team qualifying for the World Cup, huh? Outstanding…

This match was so meh, it’s a struggle to fill this part out.  Full marks to DC United. Toronto never looked like they were going to get into it, so take the three points, and turn the screws on Montreal.

Player Ratings: Bono 6, Moor 6, Zavaleta 5.5, Hagglund 6 (Morgan N/A), Morrow 6, Bradley 6, Fraser 6, Bakero 5.5 (Akinola N/A), Auro Jr., Hamilton 6 (Chapman N/A), Janson 6.5

Unused Substitutions: Irwin, Hernandez, Telfer, Ricketts

Mark Hinkley

Author: Mark Hinkley

Mark is a full-time graphic designer, full-time smart ass and full-time logo, stadium and kit nerd. When he isn't writing ridiculous match reports or redesigning logos for his own amusement, he's salivating over the day that promotion and relegation occurs in MLS. You can follow him @kitnerdmark on the twitterz.

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