South Couch Report : Mexico v Canada II – The Mexining


Mexico v Canada. 10:30pm. Seriously?

So here’s the confession for tonight : I may be part time supporter. If they’re getting bested, or I fade on the couch, I’m going to bed. I got that work thing in the morning and if it’s an incomplete report, so be it.

Good shot of the Voyageurs travelling. Bless you lot.

I love the idea that Azteca is “only” expecting a crowd of 75,000 because of renovations. I bet those missing 27,000 make the difference.

Mexico has a Jesus Corona and a Jose Jesus Corona. That a new one.

On to the match :

2’ – nice cross by Canada but misses Henry at the far post.

4’ – He’s! Not! A right back!

6’ – Jimenez nearly pokes in a cross. Ugh.

This match is brought to you by Snickers – Satisface (TM)!

11’ – Borjan handles a 35 yarder.

14’ – Larin has a but of a run and draws a corner. Resulting corner has them passing the ball back over their own
half. OK, draw it is.

16’ – PENALTY – Doniel Henry hauls down Marco Fabien in the box

17’ – GOAL Guardado sends Borjan the right way, but still beats the keeper
Mexico 1, Canada 0

19’ – Canada free kick from 25 yards out and Johnson goes for glory on the volley and hammers it well over the bar.

20’ – Herrera launches a laser over the bar.

29’ – Canada earns a corner. Short and wasted. Again.

35’ – OMG I’m done. Can’t stop yawning.


Man Of The Match : Nik Ledgerwood

Goat Of The Game : Doniel Henry

Ref Rating : 4 out of 5

Kit Spotting : San Diego Chargers. Yeah, I saw it

I Am Not The Gaffer But : I thank my lucky stars I am not.

In Case You PVR’d It : let me know how it ended

Oh great flying spaghetti monster, please bestow a victory with your noodley goodness and your complex carbohydrates over the anti-pasta Mexicans.  Ramen.

Player Ratings : Borjan 7, Henry 6, James 6, Jakovic 6, de Jong 6.5, Ledgerwood 7, Hutchinson 6, Johnson 6, de Guzman 6.5, Hoilett 6, Larin 6 (all in progress)

Sub: Duncan in for Mark – half time.  Milan Borjan injured and had to be subbed out, and then Mexico score in the 3rd minute of injury time, hell of a goal to be fair, and so it’s 2-0 at the half.  And oh yeah, Honduras won earlier, so they now have 4 points and are well ahead of us on goal difference, so we’ll need at least a point in Honduras.  So, um, yeah.  I’m off to bed. Tony – over to you!

I hate myself so I’m still here, though I did get a beer to ease things. 62 minutes in. Still 2-0, best part is when camera angle keeps switching due to technical difficulties. It’s bleak.

De Guzman subbed off for Piette. De Guz was on a yellow from earlier games so makes sense.


Author: Mark Hinkley

Mark is a full-time graphic designer, full-time smart ass and full-time logo, stadium and kit nerd. When he isn't writing ridiculous match reports or redesigning logos for his own amusement, he's salivating over the day that promotion and relegation occurs in MLS. You can follow him @kitnerdmark on the twitterz.

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1 Comment

  1. Did not get a chance to see any of this. The decision to play for a tie as the game in San Salvador wore on was one many of us thought, imprudent. All signs are pointing to a showdown in Tegucigalpa. The Hondurans have go through Azteca as well.

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