THE STARTING 11: Returned TFC Christmas Gifts

'Shour'ly this will revolutionize things!

‘Shour’ly this will revolutionize things!

Sorry fans but that most holy of holy days,  Boxing Day,  has come and gone. A big part of celebrating the day when Jesus beat “Smokin’” Joe Frazier for the Heavyweight Title, (My history may be shaky. I drank a lot of egg nog. Sue me.), is collecting your gift receipts and returning those unwanted presents. While TFC supporters may be suckers for just about any kitschy item with the Reds’ badge on it, even we have limits. Some gifts are just too awful even for TFC standards… and that’s a low bar…

11. Chia Dichio

10. Herr Frings’ Canned Bavarian Pulled Hamstring

9. The John Carvery Set

8. Rolling Pins with Ricketts

7. The Steven BEITAMax Video Cassette Player

6. Maxim Usanov’s Equestrian Boxing Gloves

5. Five pack of Dunfield brand TerryTassels™

4. The ButtyPress

3. The Club Escobar Action Playset

2. Raivis FNGRS Personal Massager

1. LeiwekeGoggles

Happy Holidays party people. The Starting 11 returns in early 2016 for all of your weekly TFC list-compiled needs. Get used to it!

Author: Tony Walsh

Tony Walsh is a writer, former minor-league broadcaster and failed astronaut. Born into supporting an underachieving football club only to end up supporting a second underachieving football club - through what must be deemed as soft immigration policies - he continues to make terrible life choices. Walsh is a keen observer of the malarkey-rife sport of football and is considered one of the leading voices on the Collin Samuel Obesity Epidemic.

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