MASCOT HYSTERIA: Cozmo v Roelio
Welcome back all fans of plush pugilism for the latest round of Mascot Hysteria! This is the destination for football fans that have an unquenchable desire to see the planet’s fuzziest, googly-eye-iest and often mentally unstable mascots do battle in a head-to-whatever-the-other-one-has matchup. After last week’s debut round, we have crowned our first Mascot Hysteria Champion who now stays on to face a new opponent. What...
THE STARTING 11: Differences if Toronto FC camp was an actual camp
Toronto FC has often been accused of being a country club, but what about a summer camp? With The Reds fully settled in their pre-season camp on the shores of Lake VanneySacka, I couldn’t help but wonder what it would be like if our “Meatballs” of a football club were instead running an actual summer camp. Join me as we go Up the Creek… 11. Oatmeal cookies allocated via blind draw 10. Cheap wallets made in arts...
Chey-what? Benoit Cheyrou signed up by TFC
EDIT: This was written when it was just a rumour, merely a twinkle in John Molinaro’s eye. It’s now official, see tweets below. Sacre rouge! It looks like Toronto FC may be in the midst of a mini-French Revolution with the club linked with midfielder Benoit Cheyrou by Sportsnet’s John Molinaro. The 33-year-old who has patrolled the centre of parks throughout Ligue 1 since 1999 has been regarded in the past as a very...
Où est la pizzeria? Dominic Oduro Traded Dans L’Impact
It wasn’t quite as #inhumane as the last time Toronto FC traded a winger to our bitter rival but the devastating effects on Toronto-area pizza establishments will be immeasurable. #NeverForgetPizza Yes, TFC has indeed delivered (no word if it was 30 minutes or free) the fleet-footed, pepperoni gobbling, wacky hair enthusiast Dominic Oduro to The Cheesemakers in exchange for Irish international Al O’Cation (That’s...
THE STARTING 11: Toronto FC Video Games
One of the pleasures of off-season transfers is the chance for video game aficionados (or “gamers” as the kidz on the streetz call themselvez) to create their club’s new line-up in their football game of choice. Before the new squad even laces up a boot in real-life, grown men sitting around in their underwear have been simulating whole seasons on computers in dimly-lit basements. It’s like porno – but...
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