South Couch Report : C.D. Guadalajara v Toronto, CONCACAF Champions League Final, 2nd Leg (FIGHT!)

Chivas USA (RIP) as the LA Wolves

The Part I Write Before :

Guys. We had a good run. No center-backs. Bradley is playing defense. Zavaleta and Moor injured.

Bold Predictions :

  1. We’ll have fun.
  2. We’ll reminisce over the time we defeated two massive Mexican sides.
  3. We’ll look ahead to Chicago.

Only partially sorry.

On to the Match :

9′ – Altidore gets sent down the left side, Chivas keeper comes out to challenge and Jozy tries to chip, but is stopped.

11′ – Solid cross from the corner and gets headed towards goal but hits Bono in the chest.

18′ – GOAL – Shit. Pineda gets a ball through, sidesteps a defender, chips Bono.

25′ – GOAL – HOLY SHIT! Hasler with the ball to the right of goal by the line, cuts a pass back and finds Altidore who buries it. #fuckingLegend

42′ – YELLOW – Seba goes into the book complaining to the ref after getting beaten about.

44′ – GOAL – HOLY SHIT! Seba loses his marker just enough to fire a shot low to the right beating the keeper to the near post.


Halftime Mood : I’m gonna need a drink.

51′ – Hasler is having a lovely game. Fighting for a corner and gets one.

52′ – Delgado does wonderfully to fight to pick up a loose ball, lays it off for Vazquez and he let forth a rocket that’s mostly stopped by Cota, but keeps a handle on it.

57′ – SUB – Hasler off for Hamilton. Curious.

59′ – Seba gets tackled, falls to the ground, ref calls for stretcher immediately, players wave it off… bizarre.

61′ – Godinez gets a shot, beats Bono but not the post.

71′ – SUB – Chapman is off for Vazquez

83′ – Altidore goes down, and he’s hobbling.

84′ – YELLOW – Auro Jr. goes into the book for excessive fouling.

86′ – SUB – Aketxe on for Altidore.

My nerves. They are shot.

4 minutes of extra time

90+1′ – Giovinco gets a cross finds a wide open Delgado and fires it over the bar.


Full Time : Chivas 1, Toronto 2


CHIVAS – Goal 1-0
TORONTO – Goal 1-1 (Giovinco)
CHIVAS – Goal 2-1
TORONTO – Miss 2-1 (Osorio)
CHIVAS – Goal 3-1
TORONTO – Goal 3-2 (Delgado)
CHIVAS – Goal 4-2
TORONTO – Miss 4-2 (Bradley)

CD Guadalajara wins your #MOMSCCL.

Man of the Match : Bradley.
Goat of the Game : Nope.
Ref Rating : 3 out of 5
I Am Not The Gaffer, But… : Did better than expected with that line-up.
In Case You PVR’d It : Quality match but you might want to quit after the full-time whistle goes.

Bold Predictions Results :

  1. Nailed it. Fun had.
  2. Failed it. We will regale the time Toronto defeated THREE Mexican sides. Never forget that.
  3. Failed it. Nope. Not quite. Not yet.

This is the morning after reflection.  Guys, what a fucking ride.  Three new clubs to put on the metaphorical trophy case.  One goal – one touch – away from going to Dubai, and ruining Christmas with that travel bill, for the World Club Cup.  Toronto set a new standard in CCL for MLS sides, and they didn’t even need MLS to enter the damn tournament. #neverForget

Bradley played very well out of centre back.  Do I want to see this again? Absolutely not.

Just a reminder, going to penalties are as close to a coin toss to deciding a winner as you’ll get in sport short of actually flipping a coin. It’s a weak way to win. It’s a shitty way to lose, but the game had to end someday and for a result, someone has to go down.

Also, this is the first time in the tournament where the lesser side won the tie, so congratulations to Chivas MEX.

Player Ratings: Bono 7, Morgan 7, Bradley 8.5, van der Wiel 7.5, Auro Jr. 7, Osorio 6, Hasler 7 (Hamilton N/A), Vazquez 6.5 (Chapman N/A), Delgado 6.5, Altidore 7.5 (Aketxe N/A), Giovinco 7.5

Unused Substitutions: Irwin, Zavaleta, Telfer, Ricketts

Feel free to add your comments below, grieving or praising or raging.

Author: Mark Hinkley

Mark is a full-time graphic designer, full-time smart ass and full-time logo, stadium and kit nerd. When he isn't writing ridiculous match reports or redesigning logos for his own amusement, he's salivating over the day that promotion and relegation occurs in MLS. You can follow him @kitnerdmark on the twitterz.

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  1. We were treated to yet another chapter in the bildungsroman of what was once an inept football team from Toronto. It almost happened folks, complete with a patchwork lineup, yet more injuries and a hastily assembled formation to accommodate the less than ideal jigsaw piece being inserted on to the pitch. All that was needed in either leg was a slightly more technical volley, a split second to steal a glance before shooting, a stretch that didn’t overtax and the Reds would be celebrating over yet another piece of hardware.

    Tony’s aphorism “Football is a harsh mistress” rings true because of the breath and depth of the SCCL stage. As also can be said, “This is no way to decide a championship…a penalties shoot-out”.

    Here is to the heroes and memories, back to the salt-mine that is league play.

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  2. Yep, you really can’t complain about that performance, particularly with the depleted lineup they had to use. TFC gave it their all. I think we all knew if it went to penalties though that TFC wouldn’t have a chance. That is one area that I think MLS clubs likely are a bit behind on. The hard-working style of the MLS clubs has shown to be able to stand up to the technical finesse of the Mexican clubs, but in a pure skills competition of a shoot-out, I feel that the Mexican guys all have an ingrained ability to shoot the ball well. A very blanket statement, I know.

    Anyway, congrats to TFC for taking us on a wild ride. It will be tough for them to re-focus their efforts on the league, but hopefully they can, and that they remember how important the MLS Cup itself is. To me, winning the MLS Cup in 2017 was the culmination of everything they’ve worked for and my hopes for them after watching them since 2007. The CCL trophy would have been icing on the cake, but not necessary. They can try again for that one next year! Let’s win MLS for now.

    Cheers TFC!!!

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