The South Couch Report : Ottawa v Toronto

The Part I Write Before The Match :

It’s V-Cup time!  Seriously, I’m excited. I’m mostly excited because soon there will more than 5 teams *gasp!*.  Can you even imagine a national cup with more than 5 teams?  You can?  I guess if you count every other country, sure.

Toronto is coming off of their first non-victory in like forever.  I don’t know how you don’t sack the whole team, but it was a draw.  I expect a comprehensive victory tonight from Landsdowne Park.

Bold Predictions :

  1. Minimum of five non-regular players (looking right at you Endoh)
  2. Ottawa scores first
  3. Toronto has one goal from the bench.

On to the Match :

10′ – Nothing of note.

17′ – Still nothing of note.

22’ – Most of the attack has been by Ottawa as of thus far. I’m wondering if Toronto rely too much on their talent that isn’t playing. Nothing really imaginative thus far.

26’ – Is Chapman trying to get booked or what? I’m getting concerned for his aggression as he ran over another Ottawa player.

31’ – Endoh dances his way into the right side of the penalty area but can’t find somebody to make the final pass to.

35’ – GOAL – BennyBalls! Quick one-two with Hamilton and Cheyrou chips the diving keeper.

37’ – Hamilton, don’t you realize if you clutch your face with two hands and go down you’re probably lying? Like 95% lying?

41’ – Obasi runs the ball about 25 yards into the Toronto left corner, and has an ambitious chip, trying to find the far post. The ball gets over Irwin and just skipped past the goal line. Trust me, it looked good.

43’ – Ottawa counterattack and Campbell gets to the edge of the box, Sito crosses behind him for a great opportunity but too much juice on the pass.

Halftime Mood : took a while to get going but ok.

45’ – SUB – Morrow off for Moor. The telly Shores us it’s not an injury.

56’ – PENALTY – Ottawa pressing on a corner and Del Campo takes a header and it goes off the far post. Rebound comes back out and a shot goes off the flailed arm of Taintor. #MitchellNiceName

56’ – YELLOW – Taintor for the hand ball.

57’ – GOAL – Williams buries it, sending Irwin the wrong way.

63’ – SUB – Ricketts on for Cooper.

64’ – Sito gets on the end of a back kick, settles it, and has a go forcing Irwin to make a big stop.

66’ – Cheyrou is down on the ground, can anyone please help the legend?!?

68’ – SUB – Morgan comes on for Cheyrou. Welcome back Ashtone.

73’ – GOAL – Sito gets a weird shot that skips by Irwin and rolls into the left corner.

Hey, full marks to Ottawa.  They’re trying things. It’s desperate but imaginative and ambitious.

83’ – Williams has a go on a free kick but Irwin makes an easy save.

90’ – Morgan floats a great ball into the box finds Edwards leaping header but his attempt was poorly finished and rolls out for a goal kick.

4 mins of extra time

90+2’ – Ricketts on the doorstep and everyone in an Ottawa kit clatters over the ball to prevent the tying goal. Edwards doesn’t care for the free kick call for Ottawa.

90+2’ – RED – Edwards gets his second yellow and his marching papers

Full Time : Ottawa 2, Toronto 1

Man of the Match : Cheyrou for doing stuff

Goat of the Game : so many goats to choose from, so much grass to munch on…

Ref Rating : 3 out of 5, seen worse.

I Am Not The Gaffer, But… : Were the kids alright?  Were they? I get it, but c’mon… c’mon…

In Case You PVR’d It : skip the first 20ish minutes, and “enjoy” the rest.

Bold Predictions Results :

  1. Nailed it. Taintor, Endoh, Chapman, Hamilton… Yeah you too Cooper.
  2. Failed it. Felt likely if they were fielding a B-team and for the first 20 minutes, that was looking true.
  3. Failed it. Came close thanks to Ricketts though.

Props to Ottawa. They had 7000+ on a night where their hockey team was in a semi-final playoff match. I think this domestic soccer thing could be OK #CanPL…  To be honest, I was sure Chapman was going to get sent off after about 20 minutes… This is bullshit. The teams don’t even have unique kit numbers like they do in other leagues #kitNerding #kidding… I’m just thrilled that the game got exciting near the end. Bit of a giant killer result, sort of, but if Toronto was half as gutsy or creative, it would have ended differently… Also, big ups to the away support.  You lot looked and sounded great… It’s strange to say, but this result reminds me that (a) we’re kinda spoiled right now and (b) there is a finite number of combinations where a senior TFC team will fail.

Player Ratings : Irwin 6.5, Morrow 6.5 (Moor 6), Hernandez 6, Taintor 4.5, Edwards 5, Cheyrou 7 (Morgan N/A), Cooper 5.5 (Ricketts 6), Endoh 5.5, Osorio 5, Chapman 5.5, Hamilton 5.5

Unused Substitutions : Bono, Alseth, Carmago, Spencer

Author: Mark Hinkley

Mark is a full-time graphic designer, full-time smart ass and full-time logo, stadium and kit nerd. When he isn't writing ridiculous match reports or redesigning logos for his own amusement, he's salivating over the day that promotion and relegation occurs in MLS. You can follow him @kitnerdmark on the twitterz.

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  1. Aren’t your ratings a bit high? Even if this is a B team, this is supposed to be the “deepest MLS team in MLS history”, sitting at the top of the standings, going on a undefeated run.

    The Fury isn’t even a good team by USL standards, I’m not even sure if they are the favorites against Toronto FC 2. So they should not be competitive against the senior team.

    The minnow defeated the Juggernaut. They ruined Vaney’s party. He should be fury-ous …

    Post a Reply
    • The ratings are based on what I expect from the player, so often they seem higher than normal. I do regret Irwin’s rating a little.

      In theory, any team Vanney puts out should beat Ottawa, and he did and they didn’t. Maybe that statue shouldn’t be made of gold just yet. Aluminum for the time being, we can plate it later.

      Post a Reply


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