THE STARTING 11: Broken TFC New Year’s Resolutions

But is it bespoke red thread?

But is it bespoke red thread?

Happy New Year chums! This one will be different surely! It’s the 10th Anniversary of the local footballer club known as The FC’s don’t ya know?! After watching Michael Bradley’s ball drop on New Year’s Eve, TFC did what many did as 2016 dawned – made a host of resolutions. However, it’s already been 10 days and things haven’t gone as planned. Much like 5 Year Plans – these things tend to break pretty quickly…

11. Get back that butty body

10. Kick the mid-season friendly addiction

9. Limit free beer consumption to only the most necessary panders

8. Stop hoarding inukshuks

7. Not being used to it

6. Have less Moor(e)s

5. Make caps wonks wonkier

4. Only buy locally-sourced, organic red threads

3. Lose that annoying DP bloat

2. Cut down on gridiron paint

1. Quit suckin’

Author: Tony Walsh

Tony Walsh is a writer, former minor-league broadcaster and failed astronaut. Born into supporting an underachieving football club only to end up supporting a second underachieving football club - through what must be deemed as soft immigration policies - he continues to make terrible life choices. Walsh is a keen observer of the malarkey-rife sport of football and is considered one of the leading voices on the Collin Samuel Obesity Epidemic.

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