THE STARTING 11: Names For The Proposed Minnesota MLS Club

North Stars

MLS’ obesity epidemic continues as Don Garber pushes on with his plan to expand the league to 200 top flight clubs in 15 divisions. Don’t worry – only 45 of them make the playoffs. Sorry TFC. While yet to be officially confirmed, the latest club to join The Majors will very likely be in Minneapolis, Minnesota – The City that Never Sleeps… until having a nice warm milk. The city’s current club, Minnesota United of NASL, are worthy graduates with a great club identity (despite no references to hometown hero Prince) but if MLS forces them to rebrand we’ve got their backs…

11. FC Twinste
10. Go Ahead Vikings
9. Prince and The N.P.G.FC
8. Red Star North Stars
7. Hubert H. Hoffenheim
6. Pucketthinaikos
5. Freezass USA
4. Dynamo Hrbek
3. VfL Timberwolfsburg
2. Minneapolis – St. Pauli
1. The Footballers Formerly Known as Minnesota United


Author: Tony Walsh

Tony Walsh is a writer, former minor-league broadcaster and failed astronaut. Born into supporting an underachieving football club only to end up supporting a second underachieving football club - through what must be deemed as soft immigration policies - he continues to make terrible life choices. Walsh is a keen observer of the malarkey-rife sport of football and is considered one of the leading voices on the Collin Samuel Obesity Epidemic.

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  1. Target should be their sponsor.

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