THE STARTING 11: Oddities of playing at Yankee Stadium in November


George Steinbrenner’s shivering ghost! “The House Next to the One Ruth Built Used To Be” was meant for dingers not fancy-pants Europeans faffing about in early winter! But alas, so it was that local foot and ball outfit Toronto FC and a few hundred hosers spent yesterday evening in the Bronx at the makeshift soccer-baseball stadium. However, it’s usually empty by November which made for some interesting sights…

11. Ridiculously narrow pitch even smaller from low temperature shrinkage

10. Reggie Jackson roams the concourses aggressively reminding everyone there’s no “Mr. November”

9. New York-style boiled hot dogs mostly inserted into gloves for warming hands

8. Visitor’s locker room full of past season’s used Yankees’ jocks

7. The only “frozen ropes” on display are actual frozen ropes

6. Frank Lampard constantly mistaken for Macy’s Parade float

5. Visiting supporters wasted on Pumpkin Spice Lattes

4. Pizza Rats have their full winter coats of fur

3. TFC fans basking shirtless in balmy weather

2. Corner flags are mostly week-old rotting Jack-o’-lanterns

1. Only cards David Villa receives from referees are early Christmas greetings

Author: Tony Walsh

Tony Walsh is a writer, former minor-league broadcaster and failed astronaut. Born into supporting an underachieving football club only to end up supporting a second underachieving football club - through what must be deemed as soft immigration policies - he continues to make terrible life choices. Walsh is a keen observer of the malarkey-rife sport of football and is considered one of the leading voices on the Collin Samuel Obesity Epidemic.

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  1. Wait a minute, “pizza rat”, is that the secret ingredient in the famous New York pizza?

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