MASCOT HYSTERIA: Roelio v Sammy the Stag
Welcome back to all of you bloodthirsty fans of head-to-head mascot massacres! Mascot Hysteria is back for a matchup of plush pugilism and we have a dandy for you in this round. Despite his nocturnal refrigerator dump taking ways, the rotund mole from Scotland’s Montrose FC – Monty Mole – turned out to be no match for this competition’s first two-time champion and bone about town – Roelio! With 67% of...
THE STARTING 11: Unusual CBA Demands From The MLS Players Union
“Strike! Strike! Strike!” No, not the fruitless begging pleas of Toronto FC supporters towards their forwards, but the possible chant from an MLS Players Union picket line. It’s true foot and ball fans of the Northern Americas, the start of the 2015 MLS season could very well be delayed by a work stoppage! While the league and its players continue to attempt forging a new collective bargaining agreement, things are...
Selling “Sorry”: TFC and Mea Culpa Marketing
It’s sad, so sad It’s a sad, sad situation. And it’s getting more and more absurd. It’s sad, so sad Why can’t we talk it over? Oh it seems to me That sorry seems to be the hardest word. – Former Watford FC Chairman, Sir Elton John Just when you thought it was safe to thread again; the red thread that was meant to connect us all under Kevin Payne is back. No word on the fate of those...
THE STARTING 11: TFC Oscars Introductions
What is the only thing longer than sitting through the next TFC Five-Year Plan? The Academy Awards ceremony! The annual homage to Hollywood’s finest (except the shameful shunning of Scott Baio’s 1982 opus Zapped!) usually runs for a solid thirty hours, testing the most dedicated viewer. A bit like 2014 at BMO Field. Much of the reason for the bloated running time of the show is the long-winded, overly-descriptive nominee...
“CAW!” vs “Hoooonk” – Preseason In Full Flight As Reds Face HB Koge
Nothing like a tasty bit of Danish on a Saturday afternoon! Eat around the swan. Around the swan. Yes, preseason is fully underway and if TFC wants to get their hands on the illustrious IMG Sucoast Pro Classic trophy (“The Succo” to its friends) then they will need to show more energy than they did against, er, Energy. Standing in TFC’s way (Saturday 12 PM EST) are Danish 1st Division bad boys HB Koge. Don’t...
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